Charity Janisse

​If I told you that I love you
would you return
would you stay
another day
and play along
with me
that song
you sing
in the background of your mind
it’s playing now
and how
it takes you back
August air
I don’t know
if it takes you there
but it takes me
it always takes me back
and the august heat
reminds me
how incomplete
I am
without the hand
that promised to brush smooth
one day
along my skin.
Through my hair
I can almost feel
your fingers there.

I’m tangled up
in an age old love
that promised a lot
but perhaps was not
enough.

still here I am
more than any man
may ever need…
spinning in this universe
shores
waves
sand
beneath my feet
salt air
teasing at my hair
but the sound in my ear
it’s not the waves

it’s your voice

full of promises
I keep
my soul saves
this place
in a reckless, restless, breathless part of my heart
where you stepped in
and stayed
you stay with me
even though you’ve never been
here within
or against my skin
you’re within…

with me

always
in ways
no one will ever be
has ever been…

And if I told you
that I love you
would you come back
would you stay
Till the end of the song
till the end of the dance
till the end of the night
would you give me the chance
to prove that I am more
than a girl who runs
when times turn tough
than a girl who runs
when she falls in love
than a girl who runs
when she feels confused
something like used
but so deep in
this goddamn
love
there is no chance of returning to the surface of
the sea of this
you are my bliss
I’m lost
I’m swimming
I’m wandering
I’m living in
a thought of you
that will not leave
it will not leave
I can’t forget

and if I told you that I loved you

would you return
and perhaps forgive
and or forget
that I got scared and that I left
would you

because I would
I’d forget
that I had not meant
enough for you to follow
​
And lately I have
released the need
to shed new tears
but I cannot release
​this mad experience
that I try to label
with a tiny word
like love
a word that means so much
so much more
than I ever understood
until we met…
now I get…

now I get it.

all the relentless fuss
over a word as small as love
​
Now I’ve wandered
the universe over
and I always return to you
and would you return to…
would you
would you if
​
If I told you that I love you.

​Charity